Make Me Feel Alive
by AwakenSoul
Summary: "In a world of chaos, he is her life jacket, her bullet proof vest, her gas mask. In a life of torment, anguish and despair, he is what brings her joy. He is the serenity in the destruction; the safety in the danger. He is hers, and she is his." Spencer/Toby Smut. Possibly more to come. Rated M. Lemon.


**There is not enough spoby smutt on this site. It's very sad. :( Not sure if this is okay or not? Should I continue writing smut one shots?! Leave a review. If I get at least 7 or 8 on this, I think I'll write more smut, but like... idk if this is good. So. Ha. Hope you like it though. ;) **

In a world of chaos, he is her life jacket, her bullet proof vest, her gas mask. In a life of torment, anguish and despair, he is what brings her joy. He is the serenity in the destruction; the safety in the danger. He is hers, and she is his.

"Make me feel alive," she whispers to him in the darkness. Not the kind of darkness brought on by minimum light exposure, but the darkness that enfolds from the abyss of terror and panic; the darkness that eats her insides and tries to consume her. She wants him to consume her instead. She wants to be engulfed in his light; wants to be swallowed in the exposure of his love.

The passion between them never ceases to amaze her. It hasn't faded at all. In fact, it has only seemed to grow. The fire they once had is now an explosion. Their desire for each other is now desperate. Maybe it's because of how much worse things have gotten. Maybe they both are simply just clinging on to each other with everything they can to get through the massive storm. Maybe their desperation comes from the need to survive.

His lips are so kind to her own. His tongue his so well acquainted with the perimeter of her mouth. His hands are so well known to her body. But yet, he still gives her Goosebumps. She still gets shivers down her spine and a pit in the bottom of her stomach. His touch still fills her with craving; still leaves her stomach in a deep well of want and her head in frenzy.

She stains his chest with her kisses, making sure every square inch is devoured in the presence of her lips.

Sometimes she gets angry. Gets angry about Jenna. That she got to steal this intimacy from Toby. That she had taken the thing that was rightfully Toby's. That she had touched him in ways that would never leave Toby's brain.

So sometimes she tries a little harder. She puts a little more effort forth to erase those painful memories. She gives herself more to him. She tries to destroy the marks Jenna had made on him, even though she knows it's not possible.

As she sits, straddled on this hips, one leg on each side of him, she discards her shirt, throwing it on the floor. Then she unhooks her bra, wanting to be completely exposed with him. Something that she never thought she would ever really want with anyone; something that she never thought was tangible—both emotionally and physically. But she and Toby have been a lot more open lately. They have been very keen on their promise of never keeping secrets from each other lately. It's made her realize how much easier things would have been if they had just done that from the start.

Their chests press together; flesh to flesh, skin to skin, nothing to separate them. Their lips mesh together in elation and passion; the world of pain and suffering long behind them. For right now, they are far away. They are in another dimension, free of murder and danger; a world of their own.

His hands run down her back, making her spine jolt up in an arch. His fingers educe so much from her, making every nerve cell inside her body elicit. He makes her feel alive. He makes her feel more than terrified. He makes her feel emotions that she didn't even know existed. He makes her colorless world vivid with color. He gives vibrance to her dull world.

In a swift motion he rolls them over, his hand cups her breast, making her moan slightly. She grabs onto his back, kneading her fingers tightly into his flesh. He begins to kiss down her neck, leaving molt in his wake as he further brings his lips down her body. His lips drag down the pathway of her breasts, making her toes curl inward. She lets her head fall back into the pillow, her eyes rolling behind her sockets with pleasure.

He continues down her abdominal, leaving butterfly kisses at her navel. She sighs, almost whimpering his name or something close to it as he gets closer to her pant line. She completely unwinds under his touch, forgetting every stress and worry in the world under the lust of the boy.

He begins to unzip her pants. It feels agonizingly slow, but she is pretty sure it's just the anticipation that makes her internal clock tick backwards. He drags her black khakis off, pulling them from her legs. She tries to help him, arching herself up so it's easier access. Eventually she is kicking them off, and it's like the delay never occurred.

Toby is tracing the border line of her bikini underwear, making her go completely insane. She whimpers his name, along with a desperate "please." His hands begin to roam her thighs, first the outsides, than the insides. She moans gently at the new contact of flesh. He gently pushing her legs apart, ducking his head down and grazing her inner thighs with his lips. She audibly moans at this, wrapping her legs around his back.

She feels like he is smirking.

"Oh my God, Toby…" she rasps out as he continues to place kisses on her inner thigh, only closing the distance between the place where she wants him to be. She is just about soaking wet now. She feels like she is about to implode. The pit that had been at the bottom of her stomach has taken over her whole stomach completely. Her whole entire body begs for him. "Stop," she begs.

"You really want me to stop?" he asks hoarsely, coming up to nudge his nose against hers.

She slits her eyes open, looking at him through a filter of lust and desire. "You know what I mean!" she hisses.

He smirks before dragging his lips over hers in a sensual, slow graze. She is about to beg again when she feels his fingers slip under the wet fabric. He knows her anatomy so well; has learned the structure of her body, and where to go. The first time had been great—truly amazing, but now… it's like a whole new level of satisfaction.

He watches her intently as he slips a finger inside her, watching for reaction. She grunts at the new interaction, moaning slightly as his finger rubs against her. He watches her closely, watching the curves and motions of her face. She opens her mouth, but it takes a second for anything but irregular breathing to come out. She nods, "go, keep going," she whispers, her hand coiling around his neck.

He slips another finger in, making her release another moan—this one a little more present in his ears. "Toby," she purrs, "Toby," she goes on. "Please, please, Toby," she continues.

He listens to his girlfriend's pleas, slipping a third finger inside her. His fingers graze around her insides, making her moans more consistent and louder. He eventually finds her clit, making her moan deeply and hardly. He presses his lips against her collarbone, nibbling on it.

He retrieves his fingers from her as she reaches an orgasm, a somewhat moan, somewhat scream ripping through her lips.

"Oh my God," she lets out. "Oh my God," she repeats in a pant, her chest moving up and down.

He parks his lips on her mouth, kissing her deeply and passionately. She kisses him back with equal force.

"Oh my God," she breathes as he pulls away from her lips. "I love you," she states.

"I love you too," he replies easily, putting a kiss on her neck.

She brings her hands to his pant line, "we need to get these off so I can make you feel as good as you made me."

He cannot refuse this proposition.


End file.
